Catching Up

Life happens, you pay taxes, and then you die.

I just rediscovered the joy I used to get while posting here, so I'm back and ready to catch up. So I present a few gems that have been holed up in my computer for a while, waiting for their turn in the spotlight.

As usual, when you use the incorrect word, your meaning is lost. Although, sadly, probably not lost on most people these days, as most won't notice the error. Obviously this real estate listing has something to do with fonts:

I don't remember where this came from, and I also don't remember whether or not I tried the chilli lotto:

Most instructions seem to be written in a foreign country, so this is not an unusual mistake to see. But they are always funny. Make your way out the door, NOW! The inflatable is loosing air!

This is truly sad. Obviously this car belongs to a REALTOR. And just as obviously, this REALTOR is STUPID. There is no excuse for this.

Taken from a menu at a very nice dinner one night. I can report that the Rhubarb Pie was delicious. No barbs at all, thank goodness.

Our local pest control (a necessity in the South) sent this lovely reminder about bed bugs. Hopefully they are better at pest control than they are with spelling. Although I have to agree that hosting guests could be travailing in some ways.

That's all for now. I promise to keep my eyes open and report on more when I find them. Which isn't too hard these days. Have some examples that drive you crazy? Send them on to me and I'll gladly post them.

The Truck of The Car

On a more recent note, this is from the debacle called the Casey Anthony Trial - better known as OJ #2 Trial. The media is so bent on being the first to show this and that and to overdramatize every bit of information that they forget to check what they've written. Or they are too dumb to even notice that something's wrong.

I do remember way back when there was a car/truck vehicle that featured the front of a sedan and the back was a sort of pick-up truck. Truly ugly. Maybe that's what Casey was driving. If so, I stand corrected and there is nothing to see here. Move along.

(The DirecTV note is so that I can call them each and every time I have an issue - their phone number is on the note - which is often. And I will continue to harass them with calls until they agree to replace my bad DVR. So there.)

Missississippissip - Aw Forget It.

Wondering if the headline was actually written by someone from Mississippi. That would be SO perfect!

News Channels Run By Spelling (Oxy)Morons?

I haven't been able to figure out exactly what they're trying to say here. Either it's gotten extremely windy across the midwest, or air travel just got a little dicier.

Either way it's spelled wrong. Again, this is from a national 24 hour news channel. Do they not even care anymore?

And this is why South Carolina has been stereotyped:

This is from a local news channel. Perhaps their budget issues have caused them to cut back on education?

I'm From Calio - You Know - As In Caliofornia

Haha! This is from a morning news show. We can take comfort in the fact that the hand is actually pointing out the error. ("Stupid interns! I would like everyone to know that I had NOTHING to do with this!")

Oh, OK, it's Good Morning America. Get your sh** together GMA!

Alumni Won't Be Happy Coming Home To This

It's so sad to keep getting these images from college campuses. Thanks again to Kristilyn again for this one.
Perhaps we should go with the idea that the local businesses aren't run by students or graduates of the university. Sigh.

If You Can Spell This, THEN You Are Smarter THAN Him!

Saw this today on the Book of Face:

Free Flipping E-Course. Than Merrill breaks down 27 proven strategies he currently uses for flipping homes in today's market!

Nothing I look forward to more THAN taking a course from someone who doesn't speak the language. I'm guessing that he didn't spend more THAN a few seconds writing his ad, thinking that it doesn't matter whether or not it's correct, as he probably stands to make millions off of the suckers intelligent people who sign up to learn all of his most secret tricks to become millionaires themselves. THEN he'll be the one laughing all the way to the bank.

On My Way To The Aquaitc Center

Do they have spell checkers on sign-making machines? No? Well, they might want to think about adding that feature. This spelling (the word is supposed to be aquatic - just in case you're having trouble figuring it out) was on several new city signs installed a while back to help visitors find their way around town. Except I don't think anyone will be looking for an Aquaitc Center. They could end up even more confused than when they started out. Maybe this could be turned into a positive thing - "Visit us - we have an Aquaitc Center - do you? Hah - didn't think so!"

How do you get it so wrong?

On each and every sign?

With nobody noticing?

Until they are all installed?

Who's in charge here, anyway?!

If It Ain't Broke - Add An 'N'!

This sad note was discovered on a chair in a University classroom. Obviously the chair was not, at some prior point in time, loaded with cash. (Tell me you weren't thinking that!)  It does look like someone tried to correct the note by adding an 'n' to the word 'broke'. Thank goodness for that!

Thanks to Kristilyn for her vigilant campus detective work!

R U Goin 2 The Banc?

Spotted on the website for Bank of America. This is the problem with letting young texting fools run a website. In their world, if a word can be shortened, it is. And that (to them, at least), is the only way to spell. "What do you mean 'bank' has a 'k' at the end? It's not spelled 'banck'!"

Today's Post Is Brought To You By The Letter N

Received this great photo all the way from Australia, from Eden. She says the owner of the shop saw her taking the picture, came out, looked at the sign, and then went back inside. The sign remained for another week. Guess it took him that long to figure out what was wrong.

Or maybe it's a cafe on the waterfront, and he meant it was for boats - as in mooring? Either way he's got it wrong.

One letter. There's only 26 of them but each one is so important. Never underestimate the power of a single letter.

Thanks Eden! Now I can say the blog has gone international :)

I'll Have The Torttia With Chedder Chesse

This bit of a menu mess (from a small cafe in Oklahoma) proves that just because you can't spell doesn't mean that you can't cook. The food was incredibly good - certainly not fancy or earth shattering, but just plain good. And reasonably priced.

But the menu - oy vey what a mess! Fortunately, despite the mess, we were still able to choose our favorites and enjoy a wonderful family lunch.

How many errors can you find? No, really - I want to know because there are too many for me to keep track of.

If anyone can figure out what 613.990R11.75 is supposed to be, let me know. Either the beignets (which, by the way, is spelled correctly - go figure!) are a tad overpriced, or they've included the bar code for those who like to think in black and white.

Earthquake Clatter Nerves - 7.1 On Rector Scale!

A dilemma. Publicize the URL of this horrendous news site full of unbelievable writing and therefore giving it a boost in traffic (and hence, popularity and PR and success), or show you just one tiny example of the writing to enjoy, slack-jawed, as I did this morning.

Hmmmm.

Well, seeing as this blog has three readers on a good day, the URL shall be released. Promise not to tell the world, though. I don't want to promote their ineptness.

WARNING: I will not vouch for this site! It may be harmful to your computer. Proceed at your own risk - and possibly risk any hope you may have had for mankind for the remainder of your lifes (haha - little inside humor there).

So, for the brave - I give you: News we can do without!

Please, someone, tell me that the site isn't supposed to be real, that it's a parody, or satire, or something mocking the english language! I await your distinguished reply. Wishing you good fortune and best days ahead.

This sterling example of mistranslation was originally spotted on It's Your Damned Language! - another great grammar blog.

How Do You Spend Your Lifes?

Kristilyn was shopping in Big Lots today (who doesn't love Big Lots?!) and noticed this brilliant piece of artwork. She didn't say how much it was. Big Lots usually stocks products that might have been oversupplied, or items that don't sell in the original stores. Sometimes (if you like treasure hunts), you can find brilliant buys on anything from children's toys to air filters.

I wonder why this beautifully framed, thought provoking, beacon for our moral compass ended up there? Any ideas?

I hope she bought one for me!

Nostalgic Carckers

This one is near and dear to my heart because it evokes special memories of vacations past (passed? - not sure on that one). We used to go on our vacation with friends, and before we'd leave, my friend and I would create a grocery list. Each year, we'd go over the list and adjust accordingly, as kids tastes changed and our own fondness for "Mom Chocolate" grew. So one year, we're going over the list, and discover that it had carckers as an item to purchase. (Need I explain that the planning sessions were usually accompanied by some wine and several fits of laughter.) Laughing over the small mistake, we left it as carckers and it stayed that way for years to come, evoking giggles each time we planned for the upcoming vacation.

Guess you had to be there. Anyway, we had fun with it, right Karen?

Thanks to Chris - who seems to be inundated with typos/errors wherever she roams!

Blinded By Anger

Maybe the saying, "Blinded by anger" has something to it. It seems like so many signs posted by irate people have spelling errors or bad grammar. So if you are ever inclined to vent your anger on a sign for all the world to see - do yourself a favor and have someone - anyone - check it over first. Otherwise you end up looking like the stupid one. And we wouldn't want that.

Again With The Numbers...

This just spotted on Google News:

Thousands flock for 2d day to Kennedy wake
Boston Globe - Brian R. Ballou, Andrew Ryan - ‎28 minutes ago‎
Thousands more people flocked again today to the Kennedy Library, with many coming before dawn to wait in a line two hours long to pay their respects to Senator Edward M. Kennedy.

PROOF PROOF PROOF YOUR COPY!!!!

It's not all about being first. Correct would be so much better.

Tornadeos Are A Comin'

Another good one from Chris! I don't know which station this is, but really - does it matter?

Protester Options

I'm not sure what to say about this one. Exactly what kind of option does she want? Perhaps the option to learn how to spell?

From an online newspaper, thanks to Chris!

I'll Get My Funding Elsewhere, Thank You

This appeared on a piece of junk mail that we received the other day.

Note that it is from a company that wants to help you fund your child's education.

Apparently they were not able to fund their own education.

The city is actually Charlotte, NC.